I am a working mom with two rather picky eaters and meal times have been stressful from the beginning – especially feeding twins! But we’ve picked up a few routines that have worked in alleviating the problem. We started some of these from when they were around 3 years old (some earlier than that), now they are almost 6.

I wont say that mealtime is a breeze now, there are some good days and some not so much and that varies between each kid too. But adopting some of these routines daily definitely has helped.

I often hear other parents discussing this issue and looking for solutions. So thought I’ll share these if it might help someone else.

• One thing we did from the beginning was to be firm that we eat at the dining table for breakfast, snack or meals. Its easier to cleanup too!
• At the beginning we used to feed them, so we ate after they were done. But later on, I started eating along with them. The kids love it when we sit as a family. And in summers, sometimes we eat in the backyard. They get excited about that.
• Have them help in setting the table.  Kids love to help!
• Involve them in the cooking process. My kids have always watched me cook by standing on chairs and asked questions and wanted to help. Assign small chores like handing something, mixing, etc. It can make them more excited about the food they helped make. Here is one example.
• Make a simple rules sheet such as “no playing while eating”, “no stuffing food in the mouth – chew”, “no TV while eating”, etc and ask them to include their own rules too. My boys included “no elbows on the table” which they had learned at preschool and remind me of it if I break the rule!
• In our house no TV is allowed during the week, its reserved for weekends. We don’t watch any TV during the week while the kids are around as well, we might watch after the kids are in bed.
• Our kids don’t play on the phone or tablets except on rare occasions. So that’s not an issue so far during meal time. I’ve been strict about it and I try to minimize my phone time at home as well.
• With twins when one does something, the other does it too. Positive reinforcement to the one who is eating well will motivate the other one too.
• Keep consistent and be firm. We don’t give in to their whims.
• No on-demand foods. I am firm that if they refuse to eat the food that’s made, I am not going to make something else they ask for (except if they are sick). I might make what they asked for on another day soon.
• We all eat the same foods. I might make the food less spicy and put some away for kids and add more spice to ours. Or we eat with pickles. But we eat the same foods.
• Introduce new foods slowly. When I make something new, I also make sure there are other items the kids are familiar with and like. If the kids don’t want to eat the new food, we ask them to just try it once, even just putting it on the tongue is okay. It takes some time to develop a liking for some foods.
• Talk about the nutrition in foods. Example: what vitamins are in the veggies and fruits that we are eating? which foods that we are eating have protein, fiber, carbs, dairy? which veggies are actually fruits? etc. Kids find these interesting.
• If the kids refuse to eat because they want to play with a particular new toy or watch TV, that’s fine. But they don’t get to play with that particular new toy or watch TV, and they are not offered any other food or snack until the next meal. This is a very difficult one for me. As a mom, I want my kids to eat, sometimes if that means I have to feed them. But I am learning that they will eat if they are hungry. We haven’t had to do this more than once or twice.
• Stick to a schedule – our kids eat breakfast before going to preschool where they have a schedule for lunch and snack. After coming home, we give them a healthy snack and dinner later. Its pretty much the same over weekends too. And usually there is no munching in between meals.
• Be mindful of their food portions – if I give a heavy snack in the evening, I cant expect them to eat a normal dinner portion as well.
• As a working mom, I come home from work and cook. Some days I am tired and hungry and I know that makes me cranky. I find that on days like that its better if I eat early first and then feed the kids. No guilt, they have had a snack.
• Make food fun! When I started paying attention to the way I present or serve the same foods in a fun way, kids were super excited to eat. So why not make it fun! Ideas here.

These are some of the things we practice and has helped us. I also want to make a note that this may look like a long list, but we don’t do all of these at every meal – for example, we don’t talk about the food nutrition every meal or make fun food for every meal. But some things such as eating at the dining table, no on-demand foods, sticking to a schedule are regular practices.

Would love to hear what has worked for you. Do leave a comment below.

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